Desiree, Desiree, Desiree, I have to just come out and admit that I have a huge girl crush on you. You seem to be the sweetest thing on the planet and want to design wedding dresses which is adorable. So, people probably expected you to be a darling sweet little thing who lets the guys make the first move(s). Surprise, surprise – girl is a player! I can not be more proud of you right now.

Even as an unabashed fan of the entire Bachelor/Bachelorette franchise I often get annoyed with women who seem to be willing to do whatever a guy wants just to get him to like them. While Desiree might sometime be so sweet it’s sickening, girls got game. She also answered the question of whether it is ok to kiss on a first date with a resounding yes…x2.

I think we can all agree that frequent, albeit dumb, questions women are constantly asking themselves include:

• Can I make the first move?
• Is it slutty to kiss on the first date?
• If I date more than one person at a time am I a whore?
•  If I actually share my feelings while the people I’m attracted to think I am a crazy person?

Well, thank you Desiree for answering these questions for us. Yes, we can make the first move. While guys are ‘supposed’ to make the first move, that doesn’t mean that they are any good at! If someone thinks you are a slut for kissing on a first date they don’t deserve you – run.

Desiree gets to date 19 guys but I think a handful, maybe 3-4, is a more manageable load. If you start mixing names up it is time to cut back.

Oh, and feelings. Wonderful feelings. Desiree, I know you want a guy who is open and honest, I think we all do, but I am losing faith in their existence beyond the realms unicorn land. However, this doesn’t mean we can’t make closed off guys open up! Have hope! I haven’t figured out how yet. Straight up asking “What do you think about us” hasn’t worked at all in the past. But, I shall not stop trying.

So Desiree, thank you again for being entertaining, really pretty, and teaching us all about how you can be sweet and a badass man-slaying mofo. One last thing though, why do they keep picking you up? I just don’t get it. I would put a blanket ban on carrying me when not explicitly invited to do so just for my own safety. I suggest you do the same.