Ray, Janay, and The Punch Heard Round the World
The punch heard round the world finally came back around yesterday and hit Ray Rice squarely in the jaw. Over six months after knocking out his then-fiancé (now wife) in an Atlantic City hotel elevator, Rice was officially cut from the Ravens and suspended by the NFL. The Raven’s management and NFL both claim to have not seen the footage, leaked yesterday, that shows Rice’s assault of Janay Rice, until it went public early Monday. However, what I find fascinating is that, despite the video being horrific, it doesn’t actually tell us anything that we didn’t already know.
We knew, from footage of Rice dragging a seemingly unconscious Palmer out of the elevator, that there had been a physical altercation that resulted in her being temporarily incapacitated. This was confirmed in the press, in court, and in a press conference held on May 23rd, 2014 in which Rice apologized to just about everyone except his wife for his actions.
Despite what amounts to damning evidence, the NFL gave Rice a measly two game suspension after the assault came to light. Less of a suspension than players caught smoking weed, forever setting the standard that in the NFL if you were to choose between getting stoned or committing a felony assault, always go for the felony assault. That is, as long as you can ensure that no one catches the act on camera. If this most recent footage hadn’t been release, Rice would have been back on the field by late next week.
The NFL is, in correctly punishing Rice only after the assault was seen on tape, not making a statement about stopping violence, but rather one that encourages perpetrators to make sure that there aren’t cameras around to catch them in the act. While football fans talked about not wanting to lose a standout player, a game, or a corporate sponsor, I can’t help but think of all the young Ravens fans who are being sent the message that if your physical ability is worth enough, kindness, morality, and good behavior cease to matter.
As the contract values rise, the need to be a good human shrinks.
While the incident took place in February 2014, Rice’s first public statement about it was not until a May press conference in the Ravens’ newsroom. The video, just over seven minutes long, features Rice apologizing to Ravens management, the NFL, his coaches, and fans for his actions. Interestingly, he didn’t apologize to his wife, who was seated beside him, at any time in the video.
The press conference took place months before this new footage of the assault itself came to light and was likely thought up as a chance at redemption. It is a tense and uncomfortable video where Rice recites lines that he openly admits were written beforehand and avoids looking at his wife. When Janay Rice was finally given permission by her husband to speak in the last minute of the video, she leads with “I deeply regret the role I played in the incident that night.” Let me be clear, there is nothing that she did in the video, or could have done, that excuses his behavior. If she has physically or emotionally abused him in the past, which is a possibility, that still does not permit his abuse.
Reciprocated violence is not excused violence.
Taking Rice’s removal from the Raven’s and suspension from the NFL off of the table, because it likely would not have happened had the video of the actual assault not been released, it’s scary to think about what message young men were sent by the press conference. By excusing his behavior with a slap on the wrist and a teary-eyed public apology for everything but his actions, we are actively condoning domestic violence. What boy will watch that video and say “Damn, I better not resort to violence!” Rather, the standard being set is that no matter what you do, your significant other will forgive you and you’ll get to be the “good family guy” who simply made a mistake.
Recently, a number of women have shared an image of themselves post-assault. Bruised lips and bloody noses are being shared on social media, a visual appeal for a change of behavior. The effects of violence, so often hidden behind thick makeup and a baseball cap, are being shown openly. I believe that this is a move in the right direction. When we see the results of violence, something we didn’t see in the Rice/Palmer case until yesterday’s release, it is harder to ignore them.
In stark contrast to these strong images is Janay Rice’s silent subservience during the May 23rd press conference. I don’t want to come down too hard on Janay, as I am sure that she is struggling greatly with the aftermath of the incident, but it is unfortunate that she doesn’t have the support network necessary to stand up for herself. I am not advocating that her one and only option should be to leave Rice, but she should have been encouraged to say something during her 45 seconds in front of the cameras other than an apology. Imagine how powerful it would have been if she had said “My husband’s behavior was unacceptable “ or “There is never an excuse for domestic abuse.”
As the punch heard round the world continues to reverberate on news sites and social media, it’s imperative that we take the time to discuss and digest the situation. Rice’s actions are inexcusable; no matter if or how Janay provoked him, and the NFL’s blatant under reaction is a perfect example of patriarchy at work. I can’t even begin to imagine the pressure put on Janay by the NFL to put up a strong and united front. Rather than being encouraged to speak up for herself, I imagine that she was told quite the opposite.
Now that the video of the actual assault is out in the public, and it’s impossible to ignore the brutality that took place, I hope that Janay will feel compelled to say something about the incident beyond her May 23rd apology. Strong women speaking out might not change men’s behavior right away, but it could shift culture to a point that sitting silently is the exception rather than the norm.